I hate my ex. We had a great relationship – almost perfect, in fact. I was a caring, loving, supportive partner who never did anything wrong. She wasn’t perfect, but I was ok with that because unlike her, I’m a patient, tolerant, and understanding person. For years I put up with her weird quirks and annoying habits, of which I have absolutely none. I was the perfect boyfriend, and then suddenly, for no good reason at all, she dumped me. Now she won’t stop throwing her amazing life in my face. Her career is taking off, she started dating a really great guy, traveling the world, having fun with her friends and family, and living her best life. All just to spite me.
Of course none of this is true, but it is how I feel when I let anger and resentment into my life. Resentment allows negative thoughts and feelings take over and hijack my emotions. When I’m feeling resentful, I’m full of righteous indignation, self-pity, and anger. I see the past through a distorted lens that removes personal accountability, allowing me to believe that I’m merely a helpless victim of my own choices. Life itself seems unfair, like everyone else is winning while I sit here feeling like a loser. The longer I bathe in my resentment, the stronger the feelings become, until eventually my resentments eat me alive, leading me back to alcohol, drugs, and addiction.
Alone with my anger
Anger and resentment are common amongst people suffering from addiction, but not all resentments look the same. Resentment can take many forms: jealousy, anger, self-pity, hopelessness, and paranoia, to name a few. […]