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Letting Go: Anger, Resentment, and Recovery

I hate my ex. We had a great relationship – almost perfect, in fact. I was a caring, loving, supportive partner who never did anything wrong. She wasn’t perfect, but I was ok with that because unlike her, I’m a patient, tolerant, and understanding person. For years I put up with her weird quirks and annoying habits, of which I have absolutely none. I was the perfect boyfriend, and then suddenly, for no good reason at all, she dumped me. Now she won’t stop throwing her amazing life in my face. Her career is taking off, she started dating a really great guy, traveling the world, having fun with her friends and family, and living her best life. All just to spite me.

Of course none of this is true, but it is how […]

March 26th, 2019|Categories: Uncategorized|

5 Ways to Handle Stress in Sobriety

For those in addiction recovery, handling stress and anxiety without their substance of choice can be challenging. Stress can cause a number of physical symptoms, health problems, and left unchecked, can lead to relapse. Luckily, there are a number of healthy, productive ways to deal with stress that don’t involve alcohol, drugs, or harmful behaviors. Here are some tips for how to manage stress in recovery that won’t leave you wanting to numb out:

Wreck some things

Sometimes stress can feel so overwhelming that you just want to break something to clear your head. Well luckily, New York City has two destruction rooms where customers can pay to smash electronics and other household items (with protective gear on, of course) in an effort to reduce stress […]

February 25th, 2019|Categories: Uncategorized|

Reservations and Rationalizations: Getting in the Way of My Own Recovery

When I first began my journey of recovery from alcohol and drug addiction, I didn’t do it because I wanted to get sober. Sure, I agreed to go to detox, I agreed to go to rehab, I agreed to go to my first 12-step meeting, and agreed to try to live without alcohol and drugs, but it wasn’t a decision I wanted to make. It was a decision I had to make. My body was falling apart. My mental and emotional health was almost nonexistent. Everyone in my life that I cared about – my family, my friends, my employers, my romantic partners – had told me that if I didn’t get sober, they could no longer support or enable my behaviors. People told me I was going to die. Doctors told […]

January 26th, 2019|Categories: Uncategorized|

The True Gifts of Recovery – the 12 Promises of Alcoholics Anonymous

For most people, the holiday season is a time of year filled with of joy, revelry, and togetherness with family and friends. But for those of us in recovery, the holiday season can also be a time of great stress, with lots of obstacles and stumbling blocks that can stand in the way of healthy long-term recovery.

In active addiction, my world revolved around things that I wanted but didn’t have, or things I had and wanted more of… Things that would either feed my addiction or feed my ego (which in turn would feed my addiction). I was obsessed with more. Getting more, having more, taking more, wanting more. I was suffering from the disease of more. I had an unfillable hole in me, into which I shoveled all the things I thought […]

December 20th, 2018|Categories: Uncategorized|

The Myth of the Functional Alcoholic

Warning: The following article contains frank language about alcohol and drug use that some people in recovery may find triggering. The techniques described for hiding patterns of substance abuse are meant to illustrate a downward spiral addiction, and should not be considered “tips and tricks.”

If you are struggling with substance abuse or addiction, please seek the help of an addiction specialist, alcohol and drug counselor, case manager, medical detox center, inpatient rehab, or sober living residence. If you are experiencing withdrawals from alcohol or drugs, please seek medical attention or dial 911.

 

Alcohol and drugs as part of the culture

Ever since stories of addiction, alcoholism, and substance abuse entered the pop culture canon, there have been stories of alcoholics and addicts who are able to maintain their normal, everyday lives, all the […]

October 26th, 2018|Categories: Uncategorized|

Surfing the Big Wave of Recovery

Think of your recovery like surfing a giant wave. As long as you’re concentrating on surfing that wave, (aka working on your recovery – going to meetings, talking to your sponsor, working your steps, staying in touch with your higher power), you’re balanced on your board, experiencing joy, and surfing the ultimate wave. But then your concentration breaks. You stop focusing on the wave and start paying attention to distractions around you. Maybe you start thinking about your romantic relationship, or how it’s going at work, or how you’re going to pay that next bill that’s due, or how that person you met last night perceived you, or some dumb joke you made that no one laughed at. It doesn’t matter what the distraction is, because as long as that distraction becomes more important than that wave you’re […]

October 1st, 2018|Categories: Uncategorized|